From Tension to Peace: My Struggle and Dream for Early Retirement
A heartfelt journey through debt, discipline, and the pursuit of freedom.
MP Singha
Published in MP's Thoughts · 10 min read · April 16, 2025
Published in MP's Thoughts · 10 min read · April 16, 2025
My Dream of Peace: A Soldier’s Journey Toward Early Retirement
I grew up in a family filled with turmoil and hardship. those moments were often overshadowed by the intense struggles we faced at home.I come from a family where my father, as a farmer, battled his own demons. He often became violent not because he was inherently cruel, but because he was shaped by the trauma of his past. My grandfather and grandmother never truly accepted my father, despite his best efforts to meet their high expectations. He poured all his hard money into fulfilling their demands, hoping that one day they would see him for who he truly was. Unfortunately, that acceptance never came. His struggles left their mark on our family, and it became our reality too. We grew up in a home where fear was constant, and the stress of survival became the only thing we knew.
As a child, I was constantly under stress, trying to understand why money seemed to dictate our happiness and peace. I was constantly worried about the future, how we would get by, and whether we would ever have a moment of peace. My mother, too, was affected by this ongoing turmoil, and the burden of trying to keep the family together fell heavily on her shoulders.
Even as I grew older, money remained the villain of my story. Every problem in our home had money at the center. Even now, as an adult, I constantly take tension about my father’s behavior and my mother’s health.
JOINING THE ARMY: A Ray of Hope
I joined Military. My first salary was ₹35,000—a fortune for someone like me. It wasn’t just a job—it was a doorway to duty, responsibility, and hope.
I’ve worked with full heart and discipline. But my salary never became “my money.” It became the family's solution box.
Soon My father’s struggles became my own.
Everything I earned went into fulfilling my parents’ expectation, doing everything they asked me to do.
And today, even after a decade of service,
I have nothing left for myself.
NOW: A HUSBAND, A FATHER , AND STILL DREAMING
I’m now married, with a child of my own.
But I still carry the same question inside me:
> "How will I live in peace with this income?"
I earn ₹60,000 now, but after paying EMI, insurance, saving a little I can , and taking care of household needs and family expenses, I'm left with almost nothing.
My Monthly Income Plan (₹60,000)
Category Amount (₹)
Loan EMI ₹27,000
Insurance ₹2,300
PPF (Savings) ₹10,000
SIP (Mutual Fund) ₹1,000
US ETF ₹850
Household Expenses ₹18000
Every rupee has a place.
Every rupee feels borrowed from peace
THE DREAM THAT REFUSES TO DIE
My dream has always been to find peace, to retire early, and to finally have the time to enjoy life without the constant weight of financial stress. I still think about my father and the struggles he faced, which I feel deeply connected to. Money has always been the source of my tension, just as it was for my father. But now, with my own family and responsibilities, I wonder: can I ever truly achieve the peace and security I long for?
Will my dreams of early retirement ever come true, or will they remain just that — dreams?
A home with no shouting.
A mind without tension.
A future for my child that’s free from the fear I lived in.
Maybe I don’t need crores.
Maybe peace can be built with planning, discipline, and hope.
WILL MY DREAM COME TRUE?
Sometimes it feels far away.
But I remind myself:
"I’ve made it this far. I can go further."
Through this blog, I will share my steps—my savings, my thoughts, and my plan to build a life of peace, even with a modest income.
Why I’m Writing This Blog
Not everyone will understand my story. But many will feel it.
If you grew up in a house of tension…
If your life was built on sacrifice, not choices…
If you’re carrying responsibility with an empty bank account and a full heart…
Then this blog is for you.
THE PATH FORWARD
Despite the struggles of my past, I’m determined to find a way to achieve early retirement. Through careful planning, learning to manage my income, and saving for the future, I hope to build a life of financial freedom and peace. It’s a long road, but I’m determined to reach the end — for me, for my family, and for the generations to come.
Let’s walk this path together.
Thank you for reading.
I may not have much, but I have honesty, experience, and a dream that refuses to die.
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